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Meanwhile in Russia

SEEING TRIPLE

St. Petersburg Election Ballot Features 3 Near-Identical Boris Vishnevskys

The longtime Kremlin critic accuses authorities of running the two other men as “spoiler” candidates to trick voters.
comrade christ

Jesus Was the First Communist, Russian Party Leader Says

Communist Party leader Gennady Zyuganov's comments are a far cry from the state atheism of the Soviet Union.
facts are facts

Russian Student Schools Putin on Military History

The boy's principal reportedly reprimanded him for “insolence” after he challenged Putin’s knowledge of military history. 
yellow card

Don’t Pee on Russia — It Will Cost You, Norway Says

Insulting Russia by peeing toward the border could cost you up to 300 euros. And be aware: Norway’s military border guards are watching.
tanks and tutus

Ballerinas on Tanks Perform ‘Swan Lake’ at Russia’s Army Games

The metaphor is a little on-the-nose.
miraculous rescue

Russian Toddler Survives 3 Nights Missing in the Woods

More than 1,000 people were involved in round-the-clock search efforts.
heroic deeds

German Shepherd Becomes First Russian Dog to Win Canine Loyalty Award

The 9-year-old police dog was recognized for rescuing a 15-year-old girl from rape.
sweet promotion

Russian City Recruits Traditional Gingerbread Cookie for Emergencies Ministry Gig

Only pryaniki can prevent forest fires.
spiritual temptation

Russian Woman Sues McDonald’s After ‘Succumbing’ to Burger Ad During Lent – Reports

The Russian Orthodox Church advised the woman to “go to confession instead of the court.”
clairvoyant commercial

In Russian State TV Ad, Fortune Tellers Say Vaccination Is in Your Future

Your “fate will become clear” after getting vaccinated, the PSA's fortune tellers say.
#wewillROCyou

Russian FM Spokeswoman Throws Punches at 'Press' in Support of Olympic Athletes

Maria Zakharova can be seen punching a dummy labeled with the word “PRESS” before fielding questions about the Olympics. 
Hog Heaven

Russian MP Opens Slaughterhouse to Send Animals to a ‘Brighter Future’

“Get ready,” deputy Alexander Iltyakov warned journalists covering the opening ceremony. “There’s going to be lots of blood.”
proof of immunity

Moscow's QR Code Passes Get the Tattoo Treatment

Soon, you can simply scan a temporary tattoo on your arm to enter the city's restaurants.
tank or turtle?

Russian Military Tips Over 40-Ton Battle Tank

The T-80 tank is undoubtedly less effective upside-down.
lost patience

Russian Passenger Derails Flight By Opening Emergency Exit Before Takeoff

The Moscow-Antalya flight's air conditioning reportedly malfunctioned as passengers sat in the cabin for two hours.
Skydiving Surprise

Russian Parachutist’s Air Conditioner Crash-Landing Catches Internet’s Attention

A flight-school student in Krasnodar made an unscheduled stop on the way down.
four-legged flight

Ruff Landing: Russia Tests Dog Parachutes

The canine parachute system could be used to allow dogs to join paratroopers or rescuers.
divine intervention

Russian Football Team Needs ‘Spiritual Training,’ Orthodox Bishop Says

The national team failed to make it to the Euro 2020 quarter-finals because its players are “spiritually weak,” a Church bishop said.
pandemic romance

Who Pays for the PCR Test on the First Date?: The Rules of Moscow Covid Dating

A slew of new restrictions in Russia's capital is forcing many to evaluate the do's and don'ts of dating.
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