His father is at his wit's end. "Dima has only one task, to walk the dog, morning and evening, and he cannot even do that," he sighs. "At 11 a.m. I try to wake him, saying, 'Dima, you haven't walked the dog, he'll make a mess and you'll have to clean it up.' But Dima goes on sleeping. At noon, the same. At one o'clock, the same. I throw water on him to rouse him. Finally he gets up, ambles to the bathroom and spends the next half hour doing his hair. I walk the dog.
"In the afternoon, Dima hangs out in the yard, smoking. In the evening, he watches kick-boxing films and cannot tear himself away to walk the dog. His sister does it. I say to him, 'Dima, are you a real man? How can you let your sister walk the streets in the dark?' His eyes never leave the screen. At night he is not tired because he has slept half the day and he keeps us awake with his videos until three in the morning."
Being a teenager is not easy, anywhere in the world. Being a teenager in today's Russia is especially difficult. Parenting one is a nightmare.
"Society is in a state of anarchy, so of course our kids are confused," says Anatoly, a writer struggling on a salary of 300,000 rubles ($66) a month. "They look at my generation, see how poorly we are living and conclude that education is a waste of time. You know what I think of the army. But I am starting to think the army might be the only answer for Dima."
Perhaps. And yet there is a chance that Dima will wake up by himself from adolescence to adult responsibility. The person to help him might not be his nagging dad but his 16-year-old cousin Denis.
I have known Denis for over a year, but only last week did the sulky boy suddenly speak to me. He asked me to bring him a packet of nicotine chewing gum from England to help him give up smoking. Imagine that. At 16, Denis is trying to kick the habit!
In recent months, Denis has given his parents even more heartache than Dima is giving Anatoly and Galina. Last year he ran away from home and lived as a bomzh, or tramp, for several days. "It was O.K., it was summer. I met lots of interesting people," he grinned.
But he has changed. He has been bitten by the bug of enterprise. He has become a small businessman and is contributing to the family budget.
His father is an engineer who trades in tools. "I realized the world did not owe me a living," said Denis. "My sister got some money for her wedding so I borrowed from her to buy one of Dad's tools. I sold it, paid back the debt and still made a profit. I was excited."
Now Denis goes to technical college in the week and sells tools at a street market on weekends. He is building up capital to fulfil his dream of owning a shop. When he bought his mother a leather coat, she said it was the proudest moment of her life. I have a feeling Dima may surprise his parents one day too.
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