To Our Readers
	The Moscow Times welcomes letters to the editor. Letters for publication should be signed and bear the signatory's address and telephone number. Letters to the editor should be sent by fax to (7-495) 232-6529, by e-mail to oped@imedia.ru, or by post. The Moscow Times reserves the right to edit letters. Email the Opinion Page Editor

С гулькин нос: a pitifully small amount of something



I've got noses on the brain. Once I started thinking about nose expressions in Russian, that's all I see or read. Then I got so interested, for the last several days я уткнулась носом в справочники по русской фразеологии (I've been buried in books on Russian expressions and idioms; literally, "I've burrowed with my nose").

Some of these phrases, it turns out, are fake nose expressions. For example, оставлять с носом sounds like "to leave someone with his nose," but here нос has a different meaning. In the old days, a suitor brought his bride-to-be's family нос or приношение (gift, offering). If the bride's family turned him down, they turned down his offering too, and the villagers would gossip: Они оставили его с носом (they turned him down with his offering). Today the expression is used to describe cheating people or leaving them with nothing: Он ушёл от жены и оставил её с носом (He abandoned his wife and left her flat broke).

I've also come across the phrase уходить с носом (to leave with one's offering) used to describe the sad plight of someone who brought нос to a bureaucrat or judge -- that is, he brought a взятка (bribe) -- and the potential bribe-taker didn't accept it. The expression can be used to describe any situation in which a request was denied or a deal fell through. In translating into English, you might reverse the image: Мы попросили увеличить дотацию от бюджета, но ушли с носом (We asked for a hike in funding from the city budget, but we left empty-handed).

But other Russian expressions shine the language spotlight on the real nose. Утереть кому-то нос (to wipe someone's nose) probably comes from the image of a helpless child who needs someone to look after his facial hygiene. Today it describes getting the better of someone and is often found in articles about sports competitions: Российские биатлонисты утёрли нос немцам (Russian biathletes whipped the German team).

Then there is the mysterious expression комар носа не подточит, which seems to mean, literally, "the mosquito doesn't sharpen a nose." But to add to the confusion, it is used to describe anything that is well-made or well-done. Huh? Apparently the key to deciphering this expression is подточить. In some parts of Russia, it was a synonym for всунуть (to shove into). In the old days, the sign of a well-built piece of furniture or house was tightly joined planks of wood -- so snugly fitted that "the nose of a mosquito couldn't squeeze in between them."

There are nicely rhymed ways of describing a good-sized schnoz: Этот нос через Волгу мост (That nose could be a bridge over the Volga). Or: Этот нос сто лет рос (That nose has been growing for a hundred years).

But small noses get their due. If someone offers a size-12 friend a size-2 dress, the friend might say: Даже на нос не налезет (literally, it wouldn't even fit on my nose). If you want to describe a pitifully small amount of something, you can say с гулькин нос. Here гулькин is the adjective derived from гуля, another word for голубь (pigeon), and "с" stands in for как: like a pigeon's beak. После выходных денег осталось с гулькин нос (After the weekend I'm down to my last dime).

But the true glory of the Russian nose is its ability to tell the future. If someone says: У меня чешется нос (my nose itches), it means one of two things: Either he's going to be drinking, or he's going to get some news.

In this case, it's best to get the bottle out so you'll have something to toast with when the news arrives.

Michele A. Berdy is a Moscow-based translator and interpreter.