I started the new year with a resolution: to take care of my health. For the past 42 1/2 years of my life, I was in the hospital three times (at the ages of 5, 19 and 28), but I have never been to a sanatorium.
But the time had now come, and I went to the south of Brittany, in a small town with the nice name of Pornic, where, over the course of a week, I experienced all the pleasures of "thalassotherapy" -- ocean-water therapy. This meant 12 hours of bathing in a pool of warm sea water -- with various jet streams, waterfalls and all kinds of Jacuzzis -- and dozing off in ionized chambers and oil baths. This is the correct way to restore your shaken health -- no match for tedious weight lifting.
As I was waiting in the spa for the next procedures, I flipped through the magazine Science and Man and came across an article by Professor Herv? Baumann called "Homo-friendship: Inevitable Mutation of Male Attachment." The article purported to reveal the underlying causes of a phenomenon that has become something of an epidemic in the West these past few years: Normal grown men abandon their wives and lovers so they can bond with other men.
The theme seemed to me all the more interesting given that something similar happened to two Moscow acquaintances of mine not long ago. They both agreed to an interview on condition that I not use their real names.
Vladislav is a descendant of a nomenklatura dynasty and now works as a bigwig in the advertising business. He was once married and later earned a reputation as an inveterate ladies' man.
"Ivan and I have had common business interests for a long time, but we really only got together last summer," Vladislav told me. "We went to the banya, where there were a few guys and about six girls. The girls were such chatterboxes that I threw them out of the pool and asked Ivan to soap me up. I remember that when we left the washroom, I told the girls, almost as a joke, that it was better with Ivan than with them -- but it all turned out to be serious. I was terribly tired of women, you understand. For them, I was a tasty morsel -- rich, free and good-looking. And they all wanted something from me: Some wanted $300, others a diamond ring, and still others wanted to hit the jackpot. I mean, they wanted to get married. But Ivan and I are on the same wavelength. I learned about simple male joys with him: hunting and fishing. Ivan and I are just back from the Amazon jungle. I feel 100 percent a man and, by the way, can now sleep with women from time to time. We don't get jealous over them. But the last thing I want to do is get seriously involved with a woman."
Alexander works in television, is recently divorced and has children.
"I felt passionate about young ladies, had ardent affairs, a good family, and I never noticed any particular inclination toward gays," Alexander told me. "The problem is that I'm crazy about my work and always put it higher than family and other personal interests. I usually came home around midnight and began to talk about my day at work. My wife would, in the best case, listen politely and indifferently, and in the worst, raise a scandal. I met Sergei while we were working on a project and immediately felt a kinship toward him. We could speak for hours about the details of a frame, argue about art, fashion, even politics. He lived alone and I often visited him after work. With time I began to stay the night. Believe me, I was attracted to Sergei not physically but intellectually and creatively. It seems to me that for a workaholic like me, this is a more reliable basis for close relations than traditional family values. In any case, I've never felt as comfortably psychologically as I do now."
The common denominator of these two stories, in my view, is simple: Both of my acquaintances are suffering from the misunderstanding, alienation, cupidity and emasculation of contemporary human relations, and sought out a solution in the old and basic value of "real male friendship." The problem is that this friendship has turned out to be embellished with a pederastic overtone -- and this is just what Baumann was discussing in his article: "A relatively short time ago, two men could sleep in the same bed or even a sleeping bag, and no one ever gave a thought about their homosexuality. The changes in sexual practice, social morals and psychology have led to a situation in which several natural human impulses have fallen into a doubtful zone of 'potential perversions.' Involuntarily finding themselves in this sphere and under the pressure of public opinion, many find no other solution than to become true 'perverts.' Although it is worth considering that what is perverted is public opinion itself."