To the rhythmic rumble-rumble-rumble-crack from lanes 2 and 3, Mikhail Surovnev outlines his vision of the future.


First: those personalized shirts, the ones with your name embroidered on the breast pocket. Second: sponsorship from some far-sighted corporation, some businessman who knows prestige when he sees it. Then, in the vague distance, just maybe: their own bowling alley.


"You understand," he says, fixing the Americans in Lane 2 with a fiercely critical eye, "the people who bowl here, they're not poor people. This could be a place where businessmen meet each other, where they make connections. Through bowling, you could get to know the right people.


"It's like cricket, or polo," he adds. "An elite type of sport."


A 12-year regular at Moscow's sole thoroughbred American-style bowling alley, Surovnev holds a record score of 258 and orders beers offhand, calling to the bartender over his shoulder. It's hard to say whether or not his dream of a full-fledged amateur league, registered with the American Bowling Congress, will come true. One thing is clear: in this place, with a bowling ball in his hand, the "temporarily unemployed" Muscovite is king of all he surveys.


"If anyone in this country bowls better than me," he confides quietly at the bar, "I haven't run into them."


Surovnev, and the half-dozen cronies who have worn permanent dents in the alley's lounge chairs, are big fish in the small pond that is the Moscow bowling scene.


On Saturday evenings all over America, bowlers are wrapping up their Brunswick 15-pounders and blowing the sweat off their fingers. By comparison, Moscow's pickings are slim. The Ismailovo Hotel recently opened a candlepin bowling alley, whose diminutive balls, says director Alexander Sorokin, are "less hazardous to ladies' manicures." For bowlers in search of the authentic American sport -- where the balls have holes in them and manicures are not a big concern -- there is only one game in town: downstairs at the Hotel Cosmos.


Even among the regulars, Surovnev imparts, there are very few honest-to-God contenders. Manager Volodya Romashov recalls the mysterious bowler who still holds the alley record -- "an Italian guy with a French passport and a Turkish appearance" who, mythically, scored 265 one night before flying out of Moscow forever. Since then, the local title has devolved to Surovnev's circle. "People who are worth watching? Maybe 20 in all of Russia. Fifteen or 20." A half hour later, his truthfulness honed by Lucky Strikes and German beer, he lowers that number to five. Most of them, he adds, are sitting at this table.


They can only get better with the added legitimacy of a team, said one friend, who would not give his name but did mention his record tally (234.) "We aren't that talented," he says. "But we could be, if someone gave us money."


Staff at the Izmailovo Hotel's "bowling-center" say their advertising campaign relies heavily on the sport's novelty value. "Everything that is the first in Russia always has great success," says Sorokin.


Of course, bowling began long before Brunswick, when primitive man first gathered outdoors to toss rocks. So Russians are catching on fast.


"I wouldn't say that it's an exotic sport to us," says manager Andrei Shunkov. "When you say the word exotic, I think of something like football. Or baseball."





The Cosmos Hotel has four standard American bowling lanes, which rent for $16 an hour or $100 for all day. Hours of operation: 2 P.M. to midnight. Tel. 215-8680. Nearest metro: VDNKh.


The Izmailovo Hotel bowling center offers "kegerban" (duckpins) for $50 a game. Hours of operation: 1 P.M. to closing. The bowling center is located on the third floor of the Beta building, opposite the nightclub/bingo parlor. The information desk on the first floor will argue convincingly that the alley does not exist. Tel. 166-7418. Nearest metro: Izmailovsky Park.


"Mini-bowling" is also available at the SoHo nightclub. Tel. 205-6209. Nearest metro: 1905 Goda.